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Posts Tagged ‘Trump Tower’

I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest speech mankind has ever heard. And I will tell you this: THERE WAS NO COLLUSION.

Two years ago, a truly great American who now stands before you took office as President of the United States. This momentous event, witnessed by the largest audience ever assembled for anything, anywhere, came as a great beacon of light for millions of Americans who had lived through terrible carnage during previous administrations. It came as a joyous dawn to end the long nightmare that had caused blood to run in our veins, rapists to mow our lawns, and child traffickers to clean our hotel rooms.

But two years later, we find that the government is shut down. For almost a month, I have been crippled by the binding tentacles of Cryin’ Chuck and Nancy, and unable to fulfill the promises I made to my base. Seven-hundred-and-thirty days (and counting) after becoming president, too many white citizens still find themselves exiles in their own land.

In a sense, we’ve come to our nation’s capital, within a few short blocks of the Trump International Hotel Washington D.C., to ask for a loan. When I was looking for money for various real estate projects before I became president, it was only Russian mobsters and money launderers (very fine people, I might add) who were all too happy to bankroll me. Their loans were a promise to all grifters that no matter how many bankruptcies one had in the past, or legal judgments filed against them, they would still be guaranteed the unalienable right to get rich by stiffing contractors or through other dubious schemes — even while holding elective positions.

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A government shutdown. Is there a more fitting way to end the first year in office of a man who is manifestly unfit for the presidency?

Some dealmaker! Even though he presides over a government fully controlled by his own party, the Negotiator-in-Chief couldn’t even cut a deal on either the Children’s Health Insurance Program (CHIP), or Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA), two programs he supposedly wants saved, and which enjoy large bipartisan support in Congress and throughout the country.

The only deals he seems to excel at are divorce settlements, paying hush money to one or more mistresses, and selling apartments in Trump Tower to despots, drug dealers, and accused mobsters and money launderers, most of whom are card-carrying Russian oligarchs.

This is the great businessman who was going to fix things in Washington. (Who knew he really meant someone who intervenes to circumvent the law or arrange for favors.) Never mind his three Atlantic City casino bankruptcies, defrauding Trump University students, stiffing contractors, American banks refusing to lend him money, and other notable business failures, (e.g., Trump Airlines, Trump Steaks, Trump Vodka, and the United States Football League).

Is it any wonder that the Genius-in-Chief wants to tear up every significant international agreement to which the United States is a signatory? When you’re so busy making it about you and your demagoguery, ignoring the majority of citizens who voted for your opponent(s), picking fights on Twitter, and driving people away with vulgar epithets and name calling, you reveal yourself as someone who is constitutionally incapable of respecting the legitimate interests of those opposite you at the negotiating table. You haven’t a clue as to how to forge a fair and enduring accord when complex national or international issues are at stake.

In fact you don’t have a clue — period — when it comes to occupying the Oval Office.

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